It has been a long time but that does not mean my troubles have gone.
I find myself once again all consumed by issues of the heart and I'm just going to get to the point...
When someone thinks that you are unquestionably "the one" how do you know when they are "the one?"
Do we love our partners as much as they love us?
When they can't live without you and you feel suffocated, is it time to leave?
When your significant other feels the "macaroni to my cheese, peanut butter to my jelly" kind of love and you don't feel that way is it logical to only hope that someday you will feel that way?
What if the feelings you "think" you should have will never come around and you just walked away from the one person who loves you more than anyone else ever will?
Why can't these things be completely black and white?
I'm filled with questions and have no answers. I can't concentrate and my heart is heavy. I just do not know what to do and I need to have the ability to focus. I just need the ability to get this off my mind and out to the world.
Parts of me wish that someone can swoop down with all the answers and let me know what my future holds. But alas that is just lofty wishing. I just need to know if it is time to let go or hold on tight?
In the past once someone reaches the last straw and I go my separate way I was able to be done with the relationship. But here I am after 2 months holding on to the thought that it could someday work. Being told we have no future was a stab to the heart. I held on to one guy in the past for all the wrong reasons and I knew that they were wrong. This time I don't know what the wrong reasons are. Granted our relationship wasn't perfect but they never are. Relationships require work but do they require work after a few months? Is it typical to question a relationship on and off? Am I guarded or will I stop questioning when it is the right person?
I thought that I had it all colored in the pretty picture that could get tucked away. I thought that seeing the person again would create closure. It just made me want to try and make it work again. What do I do?
