Right now is one of those times where I have had too many hours to sit alone and think. So one season of “How I Met Your Mother” and two pints of Ben and Jerry’s later I wonder…
Should I quit while I am ahead?
My last “relationship” has left me scarred and insecure. So to learn from my mistakes should I stop trying to make things happen or should I quit before I’m drug around and left like my feelings never mattered?
Am I just being an insecure mess right now?
I just want to feel like someone thinks about me as much as I think about them. In the last 6 months my desire for this feeling has only intensified… and so have my insecurities.
Why would any guy want to be with me when there are so many other girls out there? Why would any guy want to be with someone that is as much of a mess as I am?
I am sure I have a sign on my head that says “easy target.” I trust people to quickly and in turn get hurt. I guard myself but definitely not enough. I let people in and begin to do everything I can to make them happy without consideration for myself. It makes me happy to see other people happy, but I disregard the fact that I give them the perfect opportunity to use me.
I really think that this could be a good quality and I don’t really want to change this about me however I have been too hurt to do it again. Some things are harder to bounce back from than others and I am realizing that more and more as each day passes. I can’t help but ask myself how I opened up like this again after everything I have been through since last Thanksgiving? I tend to believe in fate and karma. What did I ever do to deserve this? I haven’t made all the right decisions, but what have I done to karma for her to be such a bitch?
karma must have you confused with someone else.
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