I'm really fucking awesome... and if someone doesn't want to put in the effort to be with me then screw them. I don't need to waste my time, energy, or tears over them.
Says one part of my brain.
The other part is silently pleading with him to get back with me. Where does desperation end? In my head I keep thinking:
"We can compromise on talking on the phone and even try webcam if that makes you more comfortable. We can just text more instead. Not like our schedules line up very well anymore anyway. And I'll come visit you as much as I can as long as it fits into our schedules. I'd rather be there than here. So it wouldn't be saying goodbye it would be see you soon. So what we don't know what is happening in January. The good news neither of us does so perhaps we will be up to going on an adventure together. Who knows? If we both like each other why can't that work?"
Ugh I sound so desperate. I feel like inside I am begging to get back together and I shouldn't have to beg someone to be with me.
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